Hi, I’m Ilia Jones, licensed professional counselor in Suwanee, Georgia.

And I want to give you a therapy trick, which is using the word “just” sometimes.

“Just” means some, barely, or no more than.

And I recommend that you use it sometimes to minimize the power and the intensity of a negative feeling or a negative situation that we’re going through and to also remind us about our ability to tolerate and live through a negative situation.

For example, if I am really mad about somebody hurting my feelings, I can stay really mad about someone hurting my feelings.

Or I can also tell myself, “It’s just the feeling. It’s just being mad. It’s just one person that hurt my feelings.”

And I am validating the emotion. I do feel it. It is real. But I’m also not giving it that much power.

So I recommend you do that sometimes. Say, “It’s just the feeling. It’s just hard. It’s just the challenge. It’s just today. It’s just one person. It’s just embarrassing. I just don’t like it.”

These are all ways in which you could validate your emotion, own it, but also not give it any extra importance and remind yourself of your ability to tolerate.

Hope this helps.